Confused

Sometimes I feel so confused about what I need to be doing. Or what I want for that matter. I am currently at this job that I hate. I have always wanted to teach music, yet no doors have even been cracked open at this point. It's a little sad. I want to move on with my life and get settled down. I want a baby, but it's not the right time for that either.
I guess these are all things that I should not be worried about. I know that God will provide--he always has. And yet I still have this desire to control my own life. I need to read the Bible more. I know that is my number one problem! I just don't even know where to start to get closer to God right now. It's been what feels like forever, but only since the beginning of the school year, that I've had real communication with God. I want to feel His presence.
We are going to a concert tonight with some awesome worship leaders and I pray that my husband and I will be so humbled by our Savior. That the one who died on the cross for us will wake us up out of this Jacksonville selfish smog!